Testosterone, Lies, and Internets

The recent shit-storm, besides being really funny, has given us all a reminder of the dark cave full of snakes that is the Internet fitness industry. Here’s the links to recap, if you missed any of it:

Supplement Marketing on Steroids by Alan Aragon

Fat-Free Mass Index in Users and Non-users of AAS – Research Review

Monday Morning Censorship Protest: The Real T-Men Speak Out

Real T-Men Speak Out: Part 2

Real T-Men Speak Out: Final Update

This has also been a nice reminder of some of the deceptive, dishonest, and borderline illegal crap that’s gone down over the years, ever since the Internet gave a voice to every idiot and con-man that cared to get on his soapbox. Which brings me something that should probably be talked about, just to give a little background and context to some of the arguments here.

Just due to the way the Internet works, things get lost. Protocols change, trends shift, interest fluctuates; the collective memory is transient. Con-men can use this to their advantage, obviously. If nobody remembers you’re a crook, it’s pretty easy to keep pulling your scam on willing marks.

For instance, how many people under 25 years old remember Usenet? When I first started lifting circa 1998, the Internet was still finding it’s place in the world. There were no blogs, no message boards (as they exist today at least), no social networking sites, no Google. What we did have was Usenet, which is somewhere between a mailing list and a bulletin board. Users with particular interests would join the relevant newsgroups, where they could start threads and exchange messages. In the 1990s, there was little choice if you wanted information and if you wanted to meet like-minded people.

If you were interested in lifting weights back in those days, you’ve probably read misc.fitness.weights (MFW). It was a chaotic hell-hole in many ways, full of trolls and spammers and so forth, but you could also learn a fair bit if you waded through some of the crap. Some of the e-personalities from MFW are still around in some form or another, even today. In fact, some of them are currently involved with T-whatever.

Usenet has largely fallen into disuse these days, supplanted by newer technologies. They’re kinda redundant in an era of forums, blogs, RSS feeds, and social networks. The good news is that Google currently maintains support for most of the old newsgroups, including searching. This will become relevant shortly.

Now let me shift gears for a moment to talk about a little history. Back in 1997-1998 or so, what we now know as “T-Muscle” was just starting out as the fledgling Testosterone.net, largely in response to some of the claims made by Bill Phillips (of EAS and Body for Life fame) in (the now defunct) Muscle Media 2000. In one of the more infamous cases of ad-copy hucksterism in all of history, Phillips claimed that HMB “feels like being on Deca”.

Deca being a common name for the steroid nandrolone decanoate, if you’re not up to date on your gym-lingo.

So Tim Patterson and TC Luoma started out on their own to allegedly reject this kind of mass-market scamming, and thus the engine of LULZ that is T-Mag was born. Fast forward to the current era, and what we see is that T-Muscle and their supplement company Bio-Test are putting out claims that Phillips could never have dreamed of.

Case in point:

“Feels like Sustanon” was a strong statement to make for Androsol. It was my idea to describe it that way, and I stand behind it.”

“Tim Patterson personally thought it felt more like trenbolone acetate, but in my book I really thought it would have been more accurate to say “Feels like Dianabol,” though that isn’t a precise match either.”

Bill Roberts claims those gems. Bear in mind that this was for a topical prohormone product (4-Androstenediol), so making any comparison to bona-fide steroids is – presumptuous, to say the least. This is the same Bill Roberts that’s proven to be one of Bio-Test’s most ardent defenders in the recent era, including in our recent shit-storm and his earlier heavily-censored tango with Alan Aragon.

Of course, this kind of thing is made possible mainly because the uninitiated really have no idea of the history involved. If only there were a way to find things once said….

Oh, wait. Remember a minute ago when I said that you can still search the MFW newsgroup for posts? You find funny things when you do that. In fact, you find some choice quotes from Bill Roberts (complete with dates, thanks to Anthony Roberts):

4/20/99
Bill Roberts wrote on MFW (misc.fitness.weights): ”Fuck TC and his outfit of lying clowns!”

3/25/99
Bill Roberts: The outfit is just so blatantly dedicated to “advertorials” for their own products, it is truly disgusting”.

3/28/99
Bill Roberts: If TC has a degree in microbiology, it is to the undying shame of the degree-granting institution. This may have been a cereal company — it seems a distinct possibility. Wonder how many box-tops he needed?”

3/20/99
Bill Roberts: ”Testosterone.net is not dedicated to providing steroid information. It is dedicated to hawking its own line of supplements. (Just in case you had not noticed the patently-obvious)”.

3/24/99
Bill Roberts: ”I certainly don’t regret my decision to inform them that I would never write for them, at any rate of pay.
Ever!”.

Anthony wrote a follow-up just a few months ago which is also worth a read. Be sure to read both links, there’s gold in them both.

Or what the hell, just click here to see what Bill Roberts thought about TC Luoma and Testosterone.net. There’s all kinds of goodies.

Oh but it gets even funnier!

Bruce Kneller, who once wrote for Testosterone.net under the pen-name “Brock Strasser”, gives us the following:

Confessions and Apologies
By Brock Strasser

Dear Fellow Athletes,

As I write this letter, much remorse flows over my shame-ridden bones. I would do anything to take back the last few months–to undo all of the lies, all of the mistruths and all of the deceptions. A fair day it would be if I could right the wrongs and magically heal all of the trouble that I have caused so many people. Today is a day of TRUTH! Today will be the day in which I even the balance just a little. I will disclose things which bring shame not only to myself but also to others. I also want today to be a day of forgiveness–forgiveness for letting my greed control my life and for attempting to ruin the lives of others. In my confession, you might hear some not too good stuff about some people you might have trusted. I hated exposing the truth about these people because they used to be my friends. However, what they have done and are now doing is wrong and I want to beg them to please STOP before they hurt someone.

First of all, who am I? Most of you know me for the writing that I have done for Testosterone Magazine at Testosterone.net. It is here where my corruption first began. Actually, my real name is not Brock Strasser. I am a known name in the bodybuilding and fitness community but my reputation is not the greatest so we decided on Brock Strasser.

T.C. Luoma and Tim Patterson had approached me with a deal I couldn’t refuse. They told me that they would hand over 15% of their company if I would write on topics that they wanted me to write on. They explained how this would result in some pretty hefty money–at least $10,000 per month. I was dazzled by the offer and I accepted. This was the beginning of my downfall. Soon after our agreement they let it be known what their intentions were. Tim and T.C. put me on a conference call and laid it out in simple terms. They said their agenda was to duplicate to a T what happened with muscle media–except this time on the internet. This plan was to use a magazine format to gain the trust of the public while simultaneously pushing their supplements. T.C. would always comment on the success that Bill Phillips had with MetRX. Basically, he took a common weight gain powder and touted it as a miracle supplement. The readers were dazzled; Phillips made a fortune; the public was ripped off.

This is where the greed came into play. I knew this whole thing was wrong for me. I mean T.C. and Tim just gave me the creeps! Well, I put all of this behind me because I needed the money for a small drug problem that I have. Anyway, after a little while, I was just as corrupt as they were. I remember many months ago how we used to sit on the phone laughing about how stupid our customers were and how much trouble we caused. Tim used to howl about all the people who would buy Tribex based on his phony emails. His favorite statement was “never overestimate the intelligence of the consumer.”

The greed made me a bastard and I hurt many people who I want to apologize to. I first want to apologize to Patrick Arnold for the trouble I caused him with his prohormones. The guys at T-Mag and myself had entered the market too late and we know we couldn’t really sell that much. Our answer was to slam others and slam them hard. Our favorite thing to do was to talk about poisons and we made this no exception. We mentioned that the prohormones contained poisonous contaminants and that the prohormones themselves were very unsafe. We were hoping that the publicity would bring people to the website and then we could steer everyone to the Tribex product. I am sorry to say now that it worked. To be honest, there isn’t any evidence of prohormones being dangerous. I personally believe they’re all right. Even Tim Patterson takes them on occassion–go figure.

My second and biggest apology is to Syntrax Innovations, Inc. and Derek Cornelius. I regrettably slammed him and his company for both the Triac and Theophylline. Honestly, neither of these compounds are dangerous but Tim and T.C. for some reason, believed in knocking out their competition–sure and swift. On both of these compounds I used the old poisonous routine. I spoke of eminent dangers, mentioned the word poisonous a few times, and called Syntrax a foolish company. Why did I do this? For money I was promised. When our tactics failed we came up with the idea to rat on them to the FDA. Since I have a few connections there with the work that I do, I decided to do it. I didn’t stop with one letter…NO! I wrote a total of nine letters to the FDA to get them to move against Syntrax. Sure enough, they finally did, I wish I could be proud of this accomplishment but I’m not. Yes, it is my fault that the very effective tiratricol is once and for all off the market.

My third apology goes to the makers of HPDX. T.C., Tim and myself thought we were on top of the world when we brought down Syntrax, and copied their Adipokinetix formula. Then along comes some fat burning compound that is touted as the next greatest thing. Instantly, we all became jealous and soon after printed a story about how usnic acid will mess up your DNA and cause mutations. Again these were nothing but scare tactics to hurt the other company.

My fourth apology goes to T.C. and Tim for participating in all of your dirty schemes. Without my help you could not have done what you have done. I allowed you to use me as a tool and for that I’m sorry. Things started going awry at Testosterone Mag several months ago when I asked them where my money was. I had been doing whatever they asked me to do but had seen very little money. They told me that everything was going back into product developments and inventory. I knew this was a lie because Tim and T.C. never believed in putting full amounts of ingredients into their products. Two examples of this blatant dishonesty are their fat burner and methoxy isoflavone product. Their fat burner is supposed to contain 1R,2S Norephedrine but instead they put the vastly cheaper and less effective DL PPA.

Their isoflavone product contains half of what it is supposed to. After another couple of months of not receiving any money I decided to wake up and face the truth. For participating in this I must give my fifth and final apology to the fitness and body building community. You work too hard for both your body and your money to be ripped off like this. At this point, all I can do is ask people to boycott their site and not buy any of their products. This would be the best justice of all!

I am currently running independent analysis of all their products and should have results shortly– this will prove what I am saying. I must do this because when I told them that I was going to do this Tim replied that they would deny everything and keep the pen name alive but just use a different writer. I will prove what I am saying with the lab tests!

The last thing I would like to do is warn a few others who have been sucked in by their money talking deals. Bill Roberts…please consider what you are doing. You used to vehemently stand against rip-off supplement companies but now you’re working for them. I hope you’ll have better success.

Once again, I’m sorry! To redeem myself I will continue to apologize and speak out against Testosterone.net, T.C., and Tim Patterson. You have not heard the last from me!

Your Servant,
Brock Strasser

Of course, Brock Strasser and his old Strasseroids column won’t be found in the current incarnation of T-Mag. That’s why you’ve got to be smart with your Google: One potato, two potato, three potato…there’s plenty more.

Now, Bruce may not be the most trustworthy source (heh) out there, but there’s a strangely appropriate saying: even a rattlesnake will keep the yard clear of rats.

You can tell TC has no love lost for Bruce, given this little rant after his arrest. Far be it from this outfit to sweep things they don’t like under the rug, right? Don’t worry, the web archive has its own copies. That’s the fun thing about the Internet: things can be forgotten, but they never go away.

The sad part is that those of us that have been around long enough remember all this crap. We remember seeing this stuff happen in cycles, we remember seeing the stupid claims and all the old products that were hyped and hyped, only to be gone a year later (e.g., look at Bruce talking about isoflavones – when’s the last time anybody was pushing that? Try to find any reference to it on T-Mag).

The people that this company (and others like it, let’s be fair) target are mostly too young to remember this crap. They come in fresh and buy the hype without question. After all, T-Mag wouldn’t lie to you, right? Look at how trustworthy and upstanding and honest they are! Look at all the science they quote!

Look at all the censorship they enforce to make it look that way. Look at all the BS they peddle to people without the critical thinking ability to see through it.

If you think I’m just making it up, hey, the record goes back over 10 years. You can search for yourself, and half the damning evidence is right on their site (or over at the Wayback Machine).

The evidence is only a Google away. This is what it is, folks.

Now, my pragmatic side says “who cares?”, and let’s be honest, there’s some truth to that. In one sense I really shouldn’t be bothered; after all, anybody falling for this kind of thing surely deserves it, right?

I can agree with that to an extent. T-mag is just a case of entrepreneurs looking to make money, and they’re using methods that are obviously very effective. In that sense, Patterson and TC deserve some credit; not just anybody could pull off this kind of thing.

On the other hand, my ethical side starts nagging that it’s just not right to use some of the tactics they’re using – and if the background of this organization is anything to judge by, they have no problems toeing, if not crossing, the very subtle line between being businessmen and raw con-artists.

The whole “I, Bodybuilder” thing is just the latest in a string of over-hyped advertising methods going back 10 years. It’s not the first and almost certainly won’t be the last.

Just remember that there’s nothing wrong in keeping grounded in reality, especially given some of the neat things you can find online.